- 목차
Definition of Gaslighting
Gaslighting is called psychological domination. Gaslighting refers to the act of guiding the behavior of the other person in the direction you want.
Gaslighting exploits human biases or attribution errors.
Conditions of Gaslighting
There are three main requirements for gaslighting. The three requirements are a close relationship with the victim, the victim's mistakes, and the victim's anxiety.
Steps of gaslighting
Close relationship between victim and perpetrator
First of all, a close relationship between the victim and the perpetrator must be premised. A close relationship relieves the victim's vigilance. They demand submission or submission from others, mainly through sympathy or excuses such as “It's all because I'm thinking of you” or “that’s what I can do better.”
Destroyed victim's self-esteem and learned helplessness
If the victim and the offender form a close relationship through the above process, the victim's small mistakes and misunderstandings can be used to destroy the victim's self-esteem. The perpetrator destroys the victim's self-esteem by bruising, by comparing the victim and others, and brainwashing the victim according to the perpetrator's thoughts.
Learned Distrust and Self-Censorship
Victims of this brainwashing distrust themselves. At this step, people around the victim will recognize that the victim is worrying unnecessarily and delusional.
Isolation and dependence
After the above steps, the perpetrator tells the victim that the victim is doing everything wrong, and that the perpetrator is right about all his actions. The perpetrator completely isolates the victim and has a huge financial and emotional impact. And the victim becomes completely dependent on the perpetrator.
Precautions of gaslighting
Gaslighting is not a psychological term. It is merely a definition of a social phenomenon rather than a psychology.
Gaslighting is not necessarily done with malice. The perpetrator may unknowingly cause psychological harm to the victim. However, if the perpetrator has the right personality or ethical standards, gaslighting will be stopped.
It is unreasonable to say that any act of overturning or correcting one's own words is gaslighting. This is because all human beings can say wrong things, and human cognitive biases act on the act of overturning words.
Pointing out moral or ethical issues should not be referred to as gaslighting. It is problematic to consider the act of giving advice on moral or ethical issues like gaslighting. This is because the above actions are merely pointing out a moral and ethical issue.
Not all gaslighting phrases are used for gaslighting. People who use gaslighting just use these phrases, and using these phrases doesn't mean they're gaslighting.
How to overcome gaslighting
Overcoming gaslighting is easy but difficult. Let's introduce the methods in turn.
build self-esteem
Developing your self-esteem has to do with your belief in yourself. A person who trusts in himself can judge for himself, and can defend himself against gaslighting or malicious acts by others.
You can get to know yourself and increase your self-esteem through efforts and actions to get to know yourself more.
Critical thinking and logical thinking skills
Critical and logical thinking skills prevent reckless acceptance of other people's words and actions. If you have critical and logical thinking, you will be able to judge for yourself about the words and actions of others, and you will be able to solve problems based on the results of your own judgment.
Reducing Dependence on Offenders
Gaslighting creates a vicious cycle of blind trust in perpetrators. It is better to seek help from someone you trust than to blindly believe what the perpetrator says and does.
3-line summary about Gaslighting
Gaslighting occurs in a vertical relationship.
Gaslighting is based on a close relationship with the victim, the victim's mistakes, and the victim's anxiety.
Ways to overcome gaslighting include developing self-esteem, developing critical and logical thinking skills, and reducing dependence on the perpetrator.